I can tuck mytits in my pants
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
