I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
