Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
