I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
