She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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