the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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