it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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