don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
