ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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