I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
