i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Randomize
