is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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