hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
