It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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