It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
We were destined to go to rehab together
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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