it wasn't lemon gatorade
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
