ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Found the puke drawer
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
