I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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