I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
