all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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