Pants 0. Shit 1.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Randomize
