I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
