So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
