This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
