After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
