Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
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