If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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