we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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