never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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