if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Is it because I queefed?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Randomize
