They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize