No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
