I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
