"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
