She's JV to your varsity
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
