a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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