if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Randomize
