When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
