she smelled like a LAN party
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
