I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize