is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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