I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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