Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
my sisters under your porch take her home
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
The adults are the big ones right?
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
