so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
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