I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
