Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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