when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
