My brain says no but my pants say off.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Randomize
