so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
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