You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
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